


Leave me

by that_squishy_robot



Category: Left 4 Dead (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Just a sad boy In a sad room, M/M, Nick is a sad boy, Sexual Content, he’ll be fine though, is this fandom even active at this point, its fun, like honestly he’s being real dramatic, nothing happens but Nick over thinking and feeling bad, real happy if you get what I mean, then hand jobs from his favorite redneck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:48:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25215763
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/that_squishy_robot/pseuds/that_squishy_robot
Summary: Nick gets separated from the group, and thinks that they’ve left him behind. It takes a toll on him. Good thing Ellis is there to bring him back to reality.
Relationships: Ellis/Nick (Left 4 Dead)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 74





	1. Separated

Nick limped his way into the safe house, only just barely being able to kick the door shut behind him. He was soaked to the bone from both the river and a raging storm outside. That however was the least of his problems. His suit was covered in blood. His own of course. All thanks to a witch he had managed to piss off. The only reason he had gotten as far as he did, was because he had taken the adrenaline shot Ellis had given him earlier.

It was starting to wear off now, leaving Nick to collapse against the filthy wall covered with names and messages to other survivors. This certainly had not been the plan. He and the others were just trying to get across an old wooden bridge before a heavy storm picked up. It had been fine. There had been no growls of infection or worry that the bridge wouldn’t hold them. Ellis had been chattering on about Keith and how he tried to fight a bull shark.

A loud crack of thunder was what interrupted his story. It signaled the Storm would be on them soon and they needed shelter. Nick would be damned if he had to walk through another hurricane.

So what had gone so wrong? Why was Nick injured and huddled up alone in a safe house? Because nothing ever went his way. The thunder had been covering up the manic laughter of a jockey. None of them had noticed it, until the creature had launched itself onto Nick’s head. 

The bridge was so small. The jockey led Nick right off the side, and into the rushing water before anyone could get a shot off. The creature was much heavier than it looked, and it had easily managed to keep him under water long enough that he lost sight of everyone else. After that, he wasn’t sure where the bastard went. Hopefully it drowns.

Of course he pulled himself out of the river right in front of a witch. He got away from her, by injecting himself with the adrenaline shot. It carried him far away from her, though not before she got one good slash on him.

Nick had gotten lucky. So fucking lucky this time around. Another safe house had been only a few hundred feet away. Its bright red doors had been like a beacon of hope for him.

It was starting to get dark, and the storm was practically covering anything that was happening outside. How long had it been? Where were the others? He couldn’t have gotten that far away from them.

Were they still looking for him? Fuck. Of course they were. Why wouldn’t they be? After every hit he’s taken so far, something like this couldn’t kill him. They knew that...but did they care?

Being alone in a silent safe house could really make your mind wander to worst case scenarios. Like what if they did decide to just leave? What if they decided he was dead and continued on? Or worse, what if they knew he was alive but wanted to finally be rid of him?

Nick didn’t really add anything to the group besides a gun. Rochelle had the vast amounts of information she’d acquired about the apocalypse, Coach was a strong leader, and Ellis was the only reason they had gotten as far as they did. Without his mechanic skills, they’d probably be stuck in Georgia still. But Nick? What did he add besides an awful sense of humor and sarcasm?

Oh that’s right, he insulted the people who were supposed to be his friends.

Nick rubbed his face, forcing himself to stand up. He couldn’t do this right now. He needed a first aid kit, and maybe some pills if there were any laying around. 

Thankfully the safe house hadn’t been fully plundered, and he found a few med kits in the next room. No pills, but maybe that was for the best. He had just injected himself with adrenaline after all.

He sat back on the floor against the wall, and went trying to peel his shirt off. It was stuck to him with a combination of blood and lake water. The absolute pain of trying to get it unstuck from his wounds kept his mind off all the bacteria that the lake was probably carrying. God he’d kill for a shower. Maybe even some hand sanitizer at this point.

Once the offending piece of clothing was off, he went to cleaning the wound. Of course it hurt like hell. There’d only been disinfectant in the kit, no wound wash.

The stinging of the cleaner had him gritting his teeth, as he squeezed the bottle over the top of his injuries.

Fuck. Ok, now he just needed to pat it dry and wrap up. Easy. Except that it wasn’t easy. It was ridiculously hard. Nick couldn’t get the bandages around his back without pulling at the injury, and he certainly couldn’t get them to stick in a comfortable manner.

Damn it. Ellis was always better at this. He had so much practice patching up that dumb ass hick friend of his, that this would have been child’s play to him.

He still had the nearly healed up injuries, Ellis had patched up for him last time to. That… that had been something. Ellis had knocked that hunter off his back and shot the damn thing with a shotgun, before Nick could even yell for help.

The whole situation had happened so fast, that he hadn’t even realized that Ellis had pulled him to his feet, and practically carried him to a safe house. 

The details were still a little fuzzy, since he’d downed a fuck ton of pain killers. Though he could still remember being alone in a room with Ellis. He could remember the kid helping him strip off his bloodied shirt, his gentle touches on Nick’s bare skin.

He had to lay face first into the mattress to keep himself calm. Weeks of being so fucking touched starved, on top of it being Ellis taking care of him, had really done the conman in.

Nick tried not to think about how much he’d like that reality right now. How he wished Ellis’s rough hands were carefully bandaging him up, as he dragged on about something stupid that Keith had done.

Of course Nick would have something bitter to say. Something like, _Shut the fuck up, Overalls._ or _Do I look like I want to hear about your redneck fuck buddy right now._

It was funny because Nick was sure that right now, he’d kill to hear some stupid story. Ellis talked… a lot. However, it blocked out so much of the world around them. When they were in a safe house for a night, Ellis could talk his head off. No one would stop him. The more he talked, the less you could hear the world ending outside.

Right now it was quiet. All Nick could hear was the rain outside, and the growls of the infected. His witch friend had made it to. She was sobbing no more than twenty feet from the door.

He wondered how the others were doing. Were they huddled up in their own safe house? Were they listening to one of Ellis’s stories? 

Nick sighed, forcing himself to stand up again. He needed to come up with a plan. He knew what the others were going to an old junk yard not far from here. Ellis had seen it on the map and had promised that there would be something for them to drive. The idea was to see how far a vehicle could get them to the coast, then wing it from there.

If Nick left as soon as the storm stopped, he could catch up to them. It couldn’t be that hard. The others would have cleared out a large portion of the infected on their way in. Nick would just have to keep a low profile until he caught up.

He could… pretend that he didn’t know they purposely left him. _Hey, I bet you fuckers thought I was dead. Ha not that easily._ He could ignore their disappointment in having him back. It was possible. He did that shit for a living after all.

It’d be hard though. Especially seeing Ellis, the one person he would have expected to come back. To give a damn of whether or not he was in the group. How bad do you have to fuck up, to have the friendliest person in the apocalypse leave you for dead?

Maybe he could do better this time around. Make himself worth having them come back for him next time. No more insulting them or arguing about every little thing. No more complaining like the others were the reason the zombie apocalypse was so unbearable.

Nick knew that the first thing he’s going to want to do when he finds them again, is hug Ellis. Which is so Childish and stupid. It’d probably only make things worse.

But god he wants to touch him, even if it’s the last thing he should do. He wants to pull Ellis into his arms and knock that stupid hat off his head. That way he can tangle his fingers in the kid’s hair, as he forces him to lay his head against his shoulder.

They could stay that way for a while. He’d be able to breathe in that strong scent of motor oil that had always clung onto Ellis despite the showers, rainstorms and fucking zombies.

It wouldn’t be the first time they’d been close like that. After all Ellis was a ridiculously touchy person. He hugged everyone after a particularly stressful situation.

The last time Nick had shoved him off and said a few choice words to him… Ellis hadn’t touched him again after that, unless it was strictly necessary. Damn it. Way to fuck up a good thing, Nick.

He sighed, running his fingers through his hair. Why was he thinking this way? He didn’t even know if they weren’t coming back. It’d only been a few hours, and the storm outside was awful. The others might be waiting for him.

Ellis might be...

Although, if he were in their shoes, he’d probably leave himself behind.

The zombie filled day had really taken its toll on him. He was exhausted. As difficult as it was going to be, Nick needed to get some rest, or he wouldn’t be going anywhere.

He leaned back up against the wall and shut his eyes. The weather was cooling off now. It couldn’t have been more than forty-five degrees. Though when you were already soaking wet and half naked, telling the temperature was probably difficult.

His sleeping bag was somewhere down river. Fucking Jockey made him lose everything. All he had left was his side arm. 

Nick regretted ever complaining about the heavy heat of the south. This was way worse in comparison. However, with how tired he really was he fell into sleep quite quickly. Or he just passed out. 

Either way they were practically the same thing for the most part.


	2. Found

Nick buried his face into the soft fabric of the sleeping bag. It smelled like it had been left under the hood of a car for a week, but it was so damn warm that he couldn’t really complain. Plus, it smelled like Ellis….

Wait a fucking minute. 

Nick jerked awake, painfully pulling at his injury as he sat up. He winced, rubbing the spot underneath the bandages. Instead of laying on the unforgiving concrete of the safe house, Nick was wrapped in a dark red sleeping bag with flannel lining…. Ellis’s sleeping bag.

Nick found himself breathing in a sigh of relief. The others came back for him. They ignored how he actively tries to make everything worse and came back for him.

Damn. They had even tried to make sure he was comfortable while he slept. He was stripped down to his boxers and had no clue where they had left his pants to dry. Though that wasn’t here nor there. He just couldn’t find it in himself to care.

He was currently alone in the room he’d passed out in. That however didn’t worry him. The group took their chances when they had the shot at privacy. There were multiple rooms in the same house, so everyone was most likely trying to rest up as well.

That was not about to stop Nick from getting up and harassing all of them. He… just needed to see them. See Ellis. 

He pulled himself out of the sleeping bag, which had thankfully been left unzipped. How hard was it to get him into that thing? How in the hell did he not get woken up? Nick must have been worse off than he had first thought.

He pushed himself off the floor, trying to ignore the flaring gash on his chest. He’d have to get Ellis to take a look at it later.

Before Nick could make it to the door, it had gently opened to reveal Ellis, standing there with a slightly confused look on his face. He was also stripped down to his boxers and scrubbed clean of the apocalypse’s grime. Maybe he and the others had collected rainwater to shower with.

Nick was slightly jealous of that fact.

“Hey Man, it’s great to see ya up and all, but yer not gonna feel any better movin around so much.” Ellis said.

It took Nick a second to register what he was saying. One because he wasn’t actually listening, and two because Ellis was right, he was not feeling better.

His vision had faded black around the edges, making him lose his footing and fall forward.

Ellis hadn’t let him hit the ground though. Instead he caught him, easily supporting his weight.

“See? What’d I tell ya. Come on, back to bed.”

Instead of moving, Nick wrapped his arms around Ellis’s shoulders, and buried his face into the curve of his neck. The kid smelled like soap now, though he still had the under-lining scent of motor oil.

Nick probably smelled like the lake, but hey that was probably something Ellis liked, right?

“It’s… good to see you, Overalls.” He mumbled quietly into his neck. 

It felt so good to hold him, and Ellis didn’t seem to mind. Instead he held him back.

“You had me worried there, ya know?” 

“You and me both, Kid.”

He didn’t protest, when Ellis slowly started pushing him towards the sleeping bag. Obviously intent on making him lay down and rest. Despite being out cold for who knows how long, Nick was still exhausted.

He clung to Ellis as the kid helped him back down onto the sleeping bag. Once he was down however, he hadn’t let go.

It felt like if he did, Ellis might disappear.

“You gonna keep me here all night?” The kid asked with a laugh. He hadn’t moved away or said anything about their state of undress.

That was one of the things Nick loved about him. You could say, _Hey let’s lay here half naked together for a while._

What would Ellis do? He’d smile, lay down and start telling some stupid story.

Nick smiled against his neck. “You know how long you left me here?” An honest question because Nick didn’t actually know. “I think you can sit here with me for a while.”

That’s when Ellis did pull away, wearing a frown that Nick realized he never wanted to see again.

“You went over that bridge so fast, I….”

Nick took Ellis’s face in his hands. “I was kidding Overalls. That was a whole fucked up situation. Glad we all came out of it ok.”

Ellis was still frowning, and Nick decided he was done looking at the kids impossibly attractive pout. He traced his thumbs over Ellis’s cheekbones, and gently brought him in for a kiss.

It was soft and slow. Two things that Nick certainly wasn’t known for. However, he couldn’t bring himself to change the pace, and he was ready for twenty-three years of southern upbringing to punch him in the face.

Nick slowly pulled away from a very confused looking Ellis. “Hey look at that. Guess there is one sure way to shut you up.”

Ellis’s confused look turned into one of annoyance. Before Nick could say anything more, he was being jerked forward, by a hand on the back of his neck.

Ellis’s kiss was the opposite. He was rough and forceful; Nick could hardly keep up. When he could finally get his bearings, he wrapped an arm around the kid’s waist and pulled them up against one another.

It felt fucking fantastic. The slow drag of their bodies against one another, the press of lips. Ellis was gripping the back of his neck hard and biting at his lips. 

Nick pushed Ellis down against the sleeping bag, laying on top of him. If they were going to do whatever it was, they were doing right now, Nick wanted to be in charge.

He was more experienced and…. honestly, he just wanted Ellis underneath him. This way he knew that this wasn’t some fever induced dream. That Ellis wasn’t going anywhere.

He took control of the kiss, showing Ellis a few of the perks that came with being with someone older and more experienced.

If the way he was grabbing on to him was any indication, Ellis was having a great time. 

Nick broke the kiss, pushing Ellis’s legs apart so he could fit between them. The whole time the kid was chasing after his lips eagerly.

Damn if that didn’t make all of Nick's blood run south. 

He forced Ellis to tilt his head to the side so he could kiss down his neck and under his jaw.

“Shit…” Ellis mumbled quietly, trying to give all of the access he possibly could. “...Nick.”

Ellis was so fucking quiet. Nick realized that it was certainly not something that he had expected. The kid was a loud talkative person, you would think that would move to the bedroom as well. 

It was so jarring that Nick was suddenly second guessing himself. Because what if Ellis didn’t want this? What if he just didn’t know what to do when his survival partner was suddenly coming on to him?

That obviously wasn’t the case, but…

“Hey Overalls.” He said only being able to pull himself away for a second to speak. He had to go back in for another kiss before continuing. “You need to tell me if you want to stop. Or if you don’t want to go any further than making out. Fuck. Just tell me what you want to do.”

Ellis blinked back to himself and looked up at Nick with a less than impressed face.

“Do I look like I wanna stop?”

“Not really.”

“Then there’s yer answer.” And he was pulling Nick back into a kiss.

Good enough for him. He rocked up against Ellis, drawing a very slight moan from the younger man.

Yep. He could work with that. Nick started working Ellis’s boxers down, which were also freshly washed and still damp. Honestly, he was doing the kid a favor. Who wanted to sit around in wet clothes?

However, he was not doing himself a favor. The awkward position pulled at his injury, causing him to wince in pain. Ellis of course could never let anything go, because he was up and gently pushing him off.

“It’s not that bad, kid.” He groaned, letting Ellis check him over. He would be fine with it, if they didn’t have better things to be doing right now.

“It sure looks that bad.”

“It’s fine, here just…” Nick leaned back into Ellis, to brush their lips together, hoping it would be enough of a distraction. Instead, it just hurt his injury more, causing him to simply lean against Ellis’s shoulder annoyed. “Son of a bitch…”

“Maybe you should sit this one out.” Ellis offered, running fingers through his hair.

Nick would admit the touch felt really nice, you know if he wasn’t fucking frustrated right now. “How the fuck am I supposed to do that Overalls?” He was going to lose it, if the kid suggested they stop after all of that. 

Instead, Nick was gently pushed back on to the sleeping bag. Before he could question it, warm lips met his own, and Ellis was on top of him.

Ellis was a rough kisser, and Nick could really appreciate that fact, especially when he roughly ground their hips together. 

Fine. He could let the kid take over just this once. “You going to be a good boy and get my boxers off?” Nick asked, as Ellis moved to kiss his neck.

“Dunno. Kind of like watching ya suffer.” Ellis said between bites to his neck.

“Dear god I’ve rubbed off on you.” Nick sighed. Thankfully not too much, because Ellis did pull off his boxers.

They couldn’t really do much, not without having the right supplies, or with the fact Nick was injured.

However, when Ellis slid a hand between them, and grasped their cocks together, that suddenly didn’t matter. As long as they both got off, Nick didn’t care how. “Come on Fireball. I know you don’t actually want me to suffer.”

Ellis buried his face in the curve of his neck as he started slowly sliding his hands up and down their cocks.

“Shit. Yeah… just like that, El.” Nick groaned, tangling fingers in Ellis’s hair. He could feel the kid’s breath against his neck. The soft gasps and moans.

“Nmm… Nick…”

“Keep going.” He mumbled, arching into Ellis’s warm body. “You’re doing great. Just keep going.” Nick could help if he wanted to. 

Though Ellis was already doing a pretty good job, plus, he couldn’t stroke his hair, trace fingers over the kid’s firm muscles, and jerk them off, all at the same time.

While it was probably for the better, Ellis was supporting all his upper body weight on the arm above Nick’s head. Fuck. If he wasn’t injured, he’d be more than happy to be pinned against the ground by him. 

That was something on its own. Nick liked control. Liked to be on top. Though right now, he realized that he would let Ellis do anything he wanted.

Wasn’t that a scary thought?

“Fuck. Ellis!” He gasped when Ellis held them just a bit tighter. Shit the kid was good at this. Which left a few questions actually.

“N-Nick!” Ellis was moving much fast now and grinding into him harder.

“Me to, Kid. Just a bit longer, yeah?”

“Uh huh.”

Nick turned Ellis’s head, so he could press those soft lips against his own. Shit. No one should have lips that nice.

Before he could warn Ellis, he was coming between them with a loud curse.

Ellis shuddered above him, softly gasping against his lips as he came to.

They stayed that way. Pressed against one another, trying to catch their breath. Nick was sure he could have fallen asleep like that… you know if they weren’t sticky… and his injury hadn’t decided to open back up.

“Shit, alright Overalls. Off.”

Ellis simply huffed, rolling to the side to lay on his back. He looked completely blissed out. 

Nick couldn’t wait till he was healed up enough to show Ellis a real good time. See how the kid looked then.

“Come on. Help me get cleaned up. “I need a shower, and you fucked up my bandages.”

“You did a shit job anyway.” Ellis laughed.

Nick did his best to look annoyed, but with that stupid goofy smile on the man laying next to him, it was impossible.

~~~  
When Nick woke up alone, he’d like to say that he didn’t panic. That he didn’t wake up with his breath catching in his chest as he scrambled out of the sleeping bag.

The fear of being left behind still fresh in his mind. However, the sleeping bag was Ellis’s, and his suit was cleaned and hanging up for him. 

The slash from the witch was stitched rather nicely. Probably done by Coach, since he would patch up his student’s jerseys. 

Nick got dressed, greatly enjoying the fact his clothes felt clean after so long. He packed up everything in the room, spotting Ellis’s hat carelessly left next to the sleeping bag. Or maybe not carelessly after last night. Everyone knew Ellis wore his hat everywhere.

On a whim, Nick placed the hat on his own head. Instantly he felt completely stupid. Guess Ellis was the only one who could make such an ugly hat look good.

Once everything was packed, he walked out of the room, finding the main living space completely empty as well. However, he could hear the others chattering along outside.

“Look who’s finally awake.” Rochelle called, as he walked outside.

“Seriously boy, it’s one in the afternoon.” Coach laughed.

They were leaning on an old truck that certainly hadn’t been their last night. It was packed up with all their stuff, and Ellis was sitting on the tailgate, with his legs dangling off the side.

“Hey, I went over a goddamn bridge. Give me a break.”

“Yeah. We know. Had to keep Ellis from going over after you.” Rochelle laughed. “Pretty sure he personally hunted down that jockey.”

Ellis’s cheeks tinted pink as he refused to make eye contact with anyone. Nick could tell he was itching to reach for his hat to pull down, like he normally did when he was embarrassed. 

He decided to have pity on the kid and give the kid his hat back… by pulling the visor over his face. 

Ellis acted like he was annoyed, but he was still smiling that goofy ass smile.

“When did you guys get in last night?” Nick asked, hopping up to take a seat next to Ellis. If he sat to close, no one said anything. Even if their legs were pressed close together.

“Around ten, I think. We ran down the riverbank looking for you for a while. Found a lot of your stuff. Sleeping bags gone though.” Coach explained.

“Eh. I’ll make do.” After all, Ellis’s sleeping bag was much warmer anyway.  
~~~

Nick and Ellis were banished to ride in the bed of the single cab truck. Rochelle was driving, and Coach said he was way too old to be riding anywhere but the front seat.

Nick didn’t really care though. He liked having the privacy. Ellis was slouched down, leaning against his shoulder. He looked like he was asleep, but Nick had already been through two Keith stories.

After all the overthinking he’d done last night, he hadn’t expected to be here… at least not like this. He should have given them more credit, they were better people than him after all.

Nick should probably try to be better as well. This was it. They only had each other now, no matter where they ended up.

He looked down at Ellis who looked completely comfortable leaning on him. “Hey kid.”

“Mmm?”

Nick gently took Ellis by the chin, so he could lean in and kiss him.

Ellis didn’t offer any type of resistance, even as he was pushed to lay down. Yeah. Nick could be less of an asshole, if it meant he could keep this...


End file.
